TweedleRep and TweedleDem in Oregon

In the Age of Obama, a.k.a. the supply-side Reagan Revolution that was actually started by Carter, it keeps getting easier and easier to practice my SMBIVA pledge.

Here in Oregon, a state that has always been a net exporter of dollars to the Pentagon and has also never summoned the nerve to economically live up to its reputation as an “alt” place, we have a “race for Governor” happening this year.

It could not be more comical or less meaningful.

On one side stands an ex-NBA basketballer, Chris Dudley, Republican, whose supposed qualifications for the job are a Yale diploma and enough money and name-recognition to have purchased himself the primary.

Dudley, as clunky with words as he was with a free throw, presents himself in the TV ads through which this campaign, like all other major campaigns, takes place, as a competitor and an outsider, who will bring — wait for it — “new ideas” to Oregon.  The “new ideas” in question?

I’ll get state spending under control, without raising taxes.

I’ll do everything in my power to help small businesses, instead of punishing them.

I’ll focus on jobs.

What else could one say to this hoary package of discredited claims, or to the spectacle of a proud Ivy Leaguer selling them as “new”?  ROFLMFAO.

And what of the inevitable TweedleDem?

He, an ex-Governor who called the state “ungovernable” at the end of his last turn as Head Babysitter, and whose girlfriend is now under investigation for graft as a contractor who receives money from the public on the theory that what she does is “helping the state attract green jobs,” wants to “ask Oregonians for their help” in reversing the Great Depression III in the state. How?

We need to let the world know Oregon is open for business.

Now, there’s a radical new plan of action, no? Maybe we Oregonians could all become six-figure consultants on how to run the world on vaporware…

If it’s possible: ROFLMFAO even more!

Market totalitarianism: It’s what’s for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and, of course, FourthMeal.

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